Showing posts with label Star Wars. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Star Wars. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Star Wars: Battles of the Outer Rim

STAR WARS: BATTLES OF THE OUTER RIM

EPISODE I

SIEGE OF RYLOTH

It is a dark time for the Galactic Republic. Civil war rages as the newly-formed CONFEDERACY OF INDEPENDENT SYSTEMS declares independence and quickly absorbs a number of important and influential systems into its number. The Republic has responded to this threat by unleashing the GRAND ARMY OF THE REPUBLIC, in what throughout the galaxy has come to be called THE CLONE WARS.

After a number of defeats on Duro, Commenor and Balmorra in the Core, the bulk of the Separatist forces have withdrawn to the Mid and Outer Rim territories, reinforcing their holdings and controlling access to the Corellian Trade Route hyperspace lanes. Emboldened by the Separatists’ seemingly hasty retreat from the Core worlds, SUPREME CHANCELLOR PALPATINE and the JEDI COUNCIL have deployed a significant force of clones and fleet elements to the Outer Rim to liberate the loyalist systems in the region and break the siege on the hyperspace lanes.

Above the tidally-locked planet Ryloth, a vast battle rages between the armies of the Republic and Separatist Forces. Enmeshed in this battle is the Venator-Class Star Destroyer JUSTICAR, recently sent to the Arkanis Sector from Coruscant to bring much-needed reinforcements to the Republic forces in the Outer Rim …


Two sessions in and the Force is strong!
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Fire up the hyperspace navicomputer and strap on your ridiculously elongated rebel helmet, its time for some Star Wars!

As most of you know, Star Wars is the greatest Space Opera of all time (definition of Space Opera notwithstanding). So my Tuesday night D&D group agreed to drop the Longswords and Magic Missiles and dive into some X-wings and Blaster Rifles after much prodding by me. We even got a sixth player to join us who altered his work schedule just to be able to shoot droids on Tuesday nights. Now that’s dedication to the Force. I downloaded a boatload of Star Wars sound effects I play during the game, and I’m always looking for more, because you just can’t have enough sounds of blaster bolts ricocheting off of lightsabers.

We’ve got a human scout pilot named ‘Rolan Antillies,’ of the upper New Corellia Antilles’es, who is a fairly crappy pilot who’s never actually successfully landed a starship/starfighter/landspeeder/speederbike, but he’s got a famous piloting name so he stays employed. There’s a Bothan scoundrel “technician” for the Grand Army who speaks binary and has an underground hacker following on the holonet that call him ‘The Warlock.’ The Jedi are represented by an acrobatic flippity-doo-dah Jedi named ‘Romulus’ who focuses on the force insomuch as it allows him to aggressively use his lightsaber on stuff; as well as his estranged twin Jedi brother ‘Remus’ who went the Force Wizard path, knocking dudes around with his mind-bullets. There’s also a half-baked jetpack-wearing Clone Sergeant/failed ARC trooper (bad early batch) named ‘A-144’ that was determined not suitable for ARC duty but too skilled (expensive) for genetic recycling, so was shoehorned into the regular Clone Army. Finally there’s the hulking Wookie ne’er-do-well named ‘Garrrgull’ who specializes in tearing the arms off of ‘bots and things.

The group consists of a bunch of semi-random Republic soldiers and contractors all thrown together in the Clone Wars after the Republic Star Destroyer they were traveling on gets hit by a couple Proton Torpedoes upon exiting hyperspace. They were all in the same Turbolift when this happened, and of course the primary power went out. Once they figured out how to get out of the Turbolift shaft the clone is contacted by ‘T-1138’, the clone commander for the ship, who lets him know that droids have breached deck D-327 (which our heroes happened to be on) and are heading for the shield generator in engineering! Early in this adventure they learned that while battle droids have terrible aim, blaster bolts really hurt when 20s are rolled by the DM. We had to break out the ‘Treat Injury’ rules pretty early in the session.

After their first harrowing battle, the PCs decided that rather than take the direct approach and get shot to pieces by battle droids, they’d go through the maintenance tunnels. During their crawl through the dark tunnels they rescued an R5 astromech droid that had become trapped in some live wiring. The Bothan nearly destroyed it trying to retrieve it, but the Corellian pilot – familiar with Republic droid tech – managed to pull off a motivator inversion and re-polarize its core matrix, all using a simple hydrospanner!* As such, the R5 astromech is surprisingly loyal to the failed pilot, and follows him everywhere beeping all the way.

After a few near-misses with avoiding those ubiquitous chasms found in all starships, a number of battles with squads of battle droids trying to destroy the shield generator, and seeing the death of a Jedi Knight at the hand of some Separatist melee-bots, the heroes witnessed a Sorolsuubian Techno-Union chief fly out of the hanger deck and into the sprawling space battle with a kidnapped Twilek ambassador in tow!

As they saw the Techno-Union Separatist leaving in his Sorolsuub Lamba-class assault shuttle, they quickly jumped into any ship they could find in hot pursuit. The pilot, humorously confident in his piloting skills, opted for one of the ARC-170 fighters taking the astromech and the force wizard along as a gunner. The rest of the crew jumped into the “Golden Mynock,” an ambassadorial YT-2400 star transport prototype. Both ships rocketed out of the docking bay in hot pursuit of the Separatist kidnapper.


The space battle was huge, and difficult to keep straight. For some reason I decided that I needed a full four Republic star destroyers, three Separatist Banking Frigates, and one Droid Controller Ship all on the map along with 23 droid tri-fighters, 16 vulture droid fighters, 11 Clone-piloted ARC-170s, 6 Jedi Starfighters, 12 space mines and 5 patches of ‘space debris’ randomly floating about the board while the chase occurred. Oh yeah, and 1/4th of the board was a gravity well due to the pull of the planet Ryloth. This was probably a little too much to keep track of for our first foray into the spaceship combat rules, but I follow the creed that if you think of some awesome thing for a game but don’t know if you can follow all the rules properly, then make rules up on the fly and still do the awesome thing.

The PCs had to do sensor sweeps to see the mines, which would move every round and disappear from the map. They also had to avoid engaging in dog fights with the droid ships as the Techno-Union kidnapper flew past them, and the droid ships would move based on a highly technical algorithm called “my 40k scatter die.” If the PCs got too close to an enemy capital ship I’d roll a chance based on the size of the ship that they get stopped by a tractor beam, but the capital ships were pretty busy defending themselves so the chance was very low.

I anticipated that the PCs would most likely try to cripple the ship they were chasing and catch up to it, using their magnetic clamps to board the ship, or they’d chase the ship into the planet’s gravity well and force it to land. Less likely, but still possible, was that the ship would make it to the Droid Control ship on the other side of the board and that the PCs would have to call in some Laat/i gunships filled with Clone Commandos to board the ship with them and take it down from inside. Instead, they decided to follow the Corellion Pilot’s lead and crash their ships into the docking bay at full speed on the same round that the Techno-Union ship landed to take advantage of the momentary opening in the capital ship’s shields, and busted up every ship in the hanger (including their own).

They crawled out of their ships and into a huge droid firefight and barely survived. A vulture droid ship crashed in behind them and began blowing the hell out of the upside-down ARC-170 the pilot was trapped in, but the Force Wizard made a heck-of-a-roll and Force Gripped it until the Lightsaber Jocky could cut it to shreds. The Wookie nearly died and almost everyone took at least a blaster bolt to the kidneys before the battle was over. You see, I had prepared an encounter in the hanger for the PCs and two groups of Clone Trooper Squads (from the Clone Wars book) just in case of the third possibility, and after a second of consideration I decided to use it as-is, minus a few battle droids that were in the path of the crashing ships. Hey, if you want to land aboard a Droid Control Ship you’re goona see a lot of droids, what can I do? To add insult to injury, the Techno-Union guy ran into the bowels of the ship with the Twilek Ambassador and got away...for now.


Once the hanger was secure and the Bothan slicer hacked into the computer they saw all droid squads in the area converging on their location, so the slicer locked a few doors, the clone and pilot set up a couple explosive traps, and they all went back to their favorite strategy – hide in the maintenance tunnels. Now I’ve got a group of hapless and very wounded Republic soldiers hiding in the astromech maintenance corridors trying to figure out how they are going to contact their buddy T-1138 and get some assistance. Do they try to get to the heavy-defended comm. station and radio for help? Should they go to the heavily-defended detention area where the Separatist bad guy is probably taking the Twilekkian Ambassador? Or should they head to the extremely heavily-defended core reactor and shut down the ship droid controller system?

I love Star Wars.

*Hydrospanner note from the Personal Log of Remus. Entry 03, 19 BBY

Sunday, July 6, 2008

No Gungans Allowed

So our DnD group is having so much fun playing DnD on Monday nights, that we've decided to add another night of gamin' to our weekly games. And we've decided to make it ... Friday nights! Because, and lets be honest, we aren't kids anymore, and saving our Friday nights in case we decide to 'go out to the bar' is about the most pathetic lie we can pretend we believe about ourselves.
Also: Season 4 of Battlestar Galactica is on hiatus until next year, so there's really nothing holding us back now.

Our group's collective second-most favorite setting for games besides the Gygaxian Middle Ages is the Galactic Space Opera setting of Star Wars! So Star Wars Saga is next on the agenda, and as I have the most Wookiepedian understanding of the setting of all of us (and the only person who owns the rulebook), I get to GM!


None of the group has played it before, but I'm not too worried. They learned 3.5, then they learned 4e. Since Saga is sort of a mixture of those two systems Saga should be no problem. The problem is deciding which setting to play in. We've narrowed it down to two choices:

Clone Wars -- The setting with the most promise that got the shortest straw with representation on the big screen. A galactic war involving Jedi + Cloned Stormtroopers vs. Battle Droids and Sith Lords? Who could possibly make that kind of premise boring? I'll tell you who: Hayden Christenson as Mannequin Skywalker and George Lucas over the age of 40. But I feel that I could present some really Jeditacular adventures set within the Separatist Wars.


Rise of the Empire -- The original Wars. Jedi hiding from a tyrannical empire! Scoundrels smuggling goods to rebel cells! AT-ATs and X-wing fighters! This setting has great promise for adventures involving padawan Jedi and escaped Wookie slaves battling the oppressive Empire. And remember, I don't believe in restricting player creation options for the sake of "story" (regardless of the title of this post), so you wanna be a Padawan Jedi Ewok? You're on! Just please try to explain it without referencing Wilfred Brimley or the Caravan of Courage.


So how do we decide what setting to play in? I'll tell you how, we do this old school: A die roll. At the Monday's weekly DnD game we'll not only make characters, but I'll also make an epic percentile die roll to determine the setting:

01-50% Clone Wars

51-00% Rise of the Empire


So what setting will it be? Stay tuned!

Update: And the winner is...

Rise of the Empire by a nose!

Since the roll was so close, I've decided to cheat and make the campaign take place immediately after the events of Revenge of the Sith. This way we can still have a bunch of Jedi padawans in the party and I can still use my clone trooper miniatures.

May the Schwartz be with you.

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Wars or Trek? What your Star choice says about you as a human being.

You're in for a treat today folks. I am going to do a little mixing of blog genres today. In today's post I am going to take a big, delicious scoop of Scantabulous, mix in a teaspoon of the Brandodojo, add a dash of the Adventurepan, and present to you:

Scanventurepandodojo!

Hopefully we can not only educate you today on the Scanventurepandojo, but can also convince you of our point of view being the most superior with a fair presentation. We're going to present both sides of the question: "What does your choice of intergalactic space opera say about your political leanings?"
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Star Trek:

For those of you who don't know, Star Trek is Gene Roddenberry's vision of the far future in which humans have not only colonized space and met thousands of other intelligent alien species (all at nearly the exact same technological level), but it is also a future in which every person in the militaristic "Federation" has a specific job and lives in a cornucopian society of brotherly love and constantly press their beliefs' onto other species (who are usually 99% human-looking with perhaps green skin or forehead bumps). Right off the bat this gives us the hint that fans of Star Trek are communists, and who would love to live in a militaristic nanny state where smoking is considered a federal crime punishable by death.

The show likes to pretend it revolves around something called "The Prime Directive." If you do a google search for "Trek Prime Directive," you'll get a million hits of green-on-black websites featuring crappy MIDI music and pasting the directive at the top as if it were the Word of the Lord (Lord Q, that is):

"As the right of each sentient species to live in accordance with its normal cultural evolution is considered sacred, no Star Fleet personnel may interfere with the healthy development of alien life and culture...blah, blah, blah"

Basically it just says: Thou shalt not mess with other species' civilizations. Spock constantly repeats the warning about the Prime Directive in every episode, as if Kirk cared. Here's the basic script outline of a Star Trek Episode:

KIRK, SPOCK, BONES, and HENSEN REDSHIRT beam (teleport) down to a previously uncharted planet full of [roll a d6: 1> Green people, 2> Blue people, 3> Humans with forehead bumps, 4-6> Regular humans] dressed in priestly robes.

KIRK
"We must...find out if these people...know of the dangers my ham-fisted acting will have on...their blue women!"

SPOCK
"We cannot break the Prime Directive captain."

HENSEN REDSHIRT is killed by a [roll a d6: 1> Energy Phaser, 2> Nazi Energy Phaser, 3> Religious Nazi Energy Phaser, 4-6> Fanatically Religious Nazi Energy Phaser].

BONES
"Dammit! He's dead, Jim."

KIRK
"I just need to contact...the ship. They can...send assistance."

SPOCK
"We cannot break the Prime Directive Captain."

KIRK
(to Nazi Alien citizens) "You don't need to be enslaved any longer! Fight for your freedom, the freedom to join the Federation!"

FIGHT SCENE commences with Kirk knocking out the leader Nazi with a two-handed super-punch.

FIN.


As you can see by that outline, in every episode they break the Prime Directive, without fail. What does this tell us about fans of the show? That they are self-delusional nimrods who live in a fantasy world of rules they never actually expect to follow.

Need more proof of their clear unsuitability as members of a realistic society? Let's talk about Holodecks. On the Holodeck, all your dreams can come true. Its a magical wonderland of 3-D interactive holograms that are indistinguishable from the real thing. So indistinguishable, in fact, that at the end of approximately 20% of the wierder (and usually cooler) episodes, they reveal that it was all a Holodeck exercise! Or a Holodeck malfunction! With the exception of Moriarty, the entire Holodeck syndrome is extremely stupid, and only reveals that Star Trek fans like to be tricked by their superiors. They prefer to be lied to about everything they see and pretend that their way of life is the best possible choice. In short, they are ripe for any charismatic leader to take control of and conquer the earth with his army of socialistic pinko commie zombie minions.

That brings us to the other side of the coin...


Star Wars

Everybody knows what Star Wars is, because it is so radically awesome that it has been able to penetrate the mind of even the most stupidly devout follower of the Way of Kirk. Unlike commie heaven Star Trek, where money has been abolished and all food comes from magic coffee maker machines, Star Wars is about revolution, rebellion, and saying "Fuck off!" to the Man. In short, Star Wars is the Rage Against the Machine of Space Operas.

The galaxy is controlled by an Evil Overlord who controls an Evil Empire, and Luke Skywalker, who is the Zach De La Rocha of the Force, takes a goddamn LASER SWORD and decides to take on the Empire. Who decides to help him? Harrison fucking Ford, that's who. Also: Gold Bikini.

The Star Wars galaxy has almost no humans with just bumpy foreheads, but instead has an entire menagerie of crazy alien species, like the Hammerhead guy from the Mos Eisley cantina and the crazy long-snout lip singer of Jabba's band. Now that's an open-minded galaxy that doesn't possess the ethnocentricity of the Star Trek Federation. The military leader of the Rebellion: A hyper-intelligent squid guy. If you were to put a squid guy anywhere near the Enterprise Kirk would be two-fist punching him before you could say "Prime Directive." Star Wars is all about freedom of the individual.

Now, some would soil the blessedness of the Holy Trilogy by bringing up the "Prequels" and immediately point to Mannequin Skywalker. As if that were enough to drive someone away from the Galactic Battle for Freedom and into the arms of the People's Democratic Republic of North Korea... er, I mean "Galactic Federation." While the "Chosen One" of the Star Wars universe was not much more than a complaining whine-o-bot, at least he did flips around SUPER BATTLE DROIDS and chopped up Dark Jedi with a LIGHTSABER. When was the last time Captain Kirk, Picard or DS9 reject Sisko did a flip? I think it was back in nineteen-ninety-um-never. But they sure look good in their matching militaristic uniforms!

In conclusion, Star Wars fans are wicked awesome freedom fighters and love to kick the Man's ass, with or without the taking of the names.
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Here I have presented the two primary choices of genre for Space Opera fans, and presented the resulting quality of citizen you can expect to enjoy each choice. I hope you take away from this lesson a better understanding of the nuances of each type of fanboy. So take this nonbiased review, and carefully consider your choice as to what Science Fiction Epic Universe you want to represent you.*

Oh, and to Lower Decks, Muncherw.com, and the Brandodojo: Consider the Gauntlet thrown, communists.


*Paid for by the Friends of Luke Skywalker and Campaigners for a New Republic.